Thursday 24 November 2011

Funny Facebook Statuses

I have no sense of proportion. Which causes me big problems. Or small ones. I'm not sure.
if your still gathering rocks to throw at me,you must have a LOT of rocks and I'm scared
I'm addicted to cold turkey and I don't know how to quit it.
Vodka is made from potatoes. Which means once upon a time, someone looked a potato and figured out how to drink it, Genius!.
found out they sell Universal Remotes at the Pound shop... I cant believe power like that is available to just anyone! Crazy!.
thinks rock is dead. And paper killed it!.
I think video games ruined my life. Good thing I have two extra lives...
was walking down the street when this man hammering on his roof called me a paranoid little freak... In Morse code.
There's a huge debt crisis in Greece. Apparently they've got bills.........they're multiplying.
When you are not looking at it, this sentence is in Spanish.

Wednesday 10 November 2010

Political Ditty

A tyranical leader called Dave
And his liberal democrat slave
Said to those who are learning
You know when you start earning
You'll owe us till you lay in your grave

Cos the fees way to small as they stand
So we're raising them up to nine grand
Till we get to the day
If your daddy cant pay
Then your uni dreams just turned to sand

University's not for the masses
Its the domain of us rich upper classes
So dont look in our eyes
As you serve us our fries
And someone gets paid for our passe
s

Wednesday 9 December 2009

The Price we pay (A trilogy)

The Journalist

A husband a son
A mortar a gun
A landscape that cannot forgive
A hidden life taker
A cruel widow maker
A death for our right to live

A mother a daughter
Face down in the water
Whose crime was to stand in the way
And from deep in a hole
Some war hungry mole
Decided it’s a small price to pay
A man with a book
And a twisted outlook
Sent the code out to our distant lands
This woke up the sleepers
Indiscriminate death keepers
And then he washed his hands

This cold Tuesday morning
Without conscience or warning
A plume took its hold on the sky
A blast mangled station
Acute devastation
The relatives break down and cry
The Cynic

An old sergeant major
A hero I’ll wager
Decides that it’s time we dug in
He gives the command
Points to some other land
Says now push off and bring me a win
A general with stars
And armoured staff cars
Watches dots on computerised skies
With one flick of the wrist
Ten more men don’t exist
But he's sure they were wonderful guys

Somewhere out east
A tyrannical beast
Uses scripture to strike up the band
They don’t read our writing
Get out there start fighting
And get back my once sacred land

The Warrior

I’ll stand up and fight
I’ve a true sense of right
Your future is safe in my hands
I’m fit and I’m able
And mentally stable
To strike down the foe down where he stands

I’m ready for orders
For fanatic marauders
And keen to restore status quo
I’m loaded with pride
As I wait for my ride
To employ all the skills that I know

A skewed view of the night
Through an infrared sight
Using method all trusted and tried
A cafe a school
No hard and fast rule
All places for snipers to hide

I park up the armour
Watch Mac the charmer
As he tries to establish rapport
He gleans information
A local train station
Could house who we’re all looking for

A perimeter laid
A gunshot grenade!
A barrage of fire from the tracks
All frenzy and rush
A god damn ambush
Find cover before th -


With the greatest of respect Lee
Remember those who gave and those yet to give

Tingle

lascivious lips ambrosia to tongue
scintillating skin rising falling
heady perfume
invading essence
breath upon breath
resounding mindsong
become one become one
entwined defined
moon etched shadow
diaphanous silk
yeilding unveiling
tangled limbs meld

screaming receptors
tingle

Thursday 26 November 2009

25 reggae classics a bluffers guide

TWENTY FIVE REGGAE CLASSICS A BLUFFERS GUIDE

1 DANDY LIVINGSTONE - BIG CITY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_TOUsdkFLY

2 TOOTS AND THE MAYTALS - SIT RIGHT DOWN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UIRb31nvfE8

3 TIGER - GUILTY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moRNILuCUM0

4 ERIC BARNETT - THE HORSE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZZCQJvLdP0

5 THE UPSETTERS - CLINT EASTWOOD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=emtOqF5_gD0

6 LOUISA MARKS - CAUGHT YOU IN A LIE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86cFvep12GY

7 LORNA BENNETT - CHAPEL OF LOVE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ng4Dth-Ytlo

8 WINSTON GROOVY - PLEASE DONT MAKE ME CRY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWBNLNXD4B8

9 HARRY J ALLSTARS - LIQUIDATOR

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RZqjFd99CPg

10 VALENTINES - BLAM BLAM FEVER

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSgtUYGjX_w

11 DAVE AND ANSELL COLLINS - MONKEY SPANNER

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcfaplTCYyk

12 ZAP POW - THIS IS REGGAE MUSIC

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CE6VWD5bwD8

13 TOOTS AND THE MAYTALS - FUNKY KINGSTON

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERiTX9Pa23c

14 THE VULCANS - STAR TREK

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgEJpjsoXdM

15 MONTEGO MELON - SWAN LAKE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQ9X5dgaQ_s

16 WINSTON GROOVY - FUNKY CHICKEN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGBlAYOXpxY

17 PLUTO - DAT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FYTL8ydERw

18 RUPIE EDWARDS - IRIE FEELINGS

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZZlQqG7hEg

19 DESMOND DEKKER - IT MEK

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y-V9Y752OYs

20 PRINCE BUSTER - TOO HOT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vmNkSzGH7uQ

21 GEORGE DEKKER - TIME HARD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ta7uNdSZ2EU

22 PYRAMIDS - GERONIMO

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTOnpk6CJ0Q

23 U ROY & JOHN HOLT - WEAR YOU TO THE BALL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gh1mZnKff38

24 HOPETON LEWIS - GROOVIN OUT ON LIFE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7FePUQwxaQU

25 HORACE FAITH - BLACK PEARL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z870c1MnFXo

Saturday 7 November 2009

Look at her A Poem

She was all i had
you feckless angels of fate
look into my soul
see all this stuff
trade with it what you will
for ill have no countenance
with you and your ilk
look at her
is this a days work done
is this to be her swansong
and these onlookers her ovation
look at her
shatterd and framed in her own waining dignity
her lifeblood on show for all to see
you winged harbingers of doom
look at her
is this what the end her life ammouted to
twisted steel and tyreworn tar
make not your move she is not yours yet
and what of chiors, pyres and bell screaming spiers
are these for the chosen few.
minions of your cruel domain
she gave me life and forged me thus
look at her
were you affraid she'd become your nemisis
you know not of fear
fear is the grey that fuels my anger
stand there and be judged you pious thieves
look at her
your victorious spoil
well know this your victory is as hollow as your promise
and i will counter your heartless deed
and justify her existance.
enough
your righteous gait offends me
be gone and leave me look at her
(The Man In The tower)

Thursday 5 November 2009

A few more words of wisdom


There are so many people who know what the lord says but so few who know what the lord does (The Man In The Tower)

If you see the light revel in it but be careful not to get blinded by it (The Man In The Tower)

Faith is a humbling meeting with the lord not a suit of armour to be worn in his name (The Man In The Tower)

You can take away anothers dignity and revel in your superiority but you cannot use that dignity to bolster your own (The Man In The Tower)